The demands and expectations on modern women are more extensive than in any other generation. While the woman is now considered “liberated” and free to pursue her own career goals and successes, she is also still relied upon for the lion’s share of that which runs the home: cooking, cleaning, childcare. As society has allowed us to marry later in life, so too have we lost the support system of a multi-generational home, with most American households based on a single-family unit.
Women are expected to excel in their careers and focus on them first and foremost, but also expected to raise children in prime child-bearing years (attitudes and realities our male counterparts do not confront).
Whether we want a career or not is not significant. Whether we choose to have a partner or not is irrelevant. Whether our bodies can or our minds desire to have children or not is immaterial.
Once we have that family, if that is what we choose and are able to achieve, we are torn between success in all realms. We are expected to continue our jobs, maintain a perfect home, provide for our children’s physical, mental, and emotional health, and somehow keep ourselves balanced. If we spend long hours at the office pushing for career and societal success, we are seen as lesser moms and spouses. If we choose to spend extra time with our family, we are seen as slacking and not committed to our career. It is difficult to climb the ladder of a career with a young family, but even more so to re-enter the workforce after taking time to establish a healthy home. Some moms do not even have the luxury of choice, living the tireless existence of single-parenthood, being the sole provider of food and love.
The COVID-19 Pandemic Reality
The COVID-19 pandemic wrought havoc amongst the women of the world. It forced us to multitask in a way that is immensely unsustainable, make choices between physical health and mental health, and sometimes sacrifice much of what we defined as our “success” to provide for our families.
Economically, women tend to earn less money, have less access to social protections, make up the majority of single-parent homes, and are more likely to be burdened with unpaid care and domestic work, leading them to leave the labor force during a crisis. Nearly half, 46% of all working women were working in low-wage jobs before COVID-19. In a survey by Brookings Institute from May and June 2020, “one out of four women who became unemployed during the pandemic reported the job loss was due to a lack of childcare, twice the rate of men surveyed.”
Emotionally, women have had “higher self-reported levels of stress, anxiety, depression, and posttraumatic stress symptoms, and more severe overall psychological impact.” Women have experienced a higher rate of domestic violence primarily due to parenting stress, and the social distancing and lock down measures only accentuated the need for a social support system. Gender disparities were exacerbated through the pandemic, quelling a woman’s capability to achieve success.
Some say you can have it all, but you can’t have it all now. But what happens when you do not have a choice? Alternatively, how do you succeed in your career and self when your top priority is your family? The pandemic truly highlighted some key weaknesses in our current system, and The Modern Woman aspires to confront these challenges head-on.